lavandarlizard2 | the gargoyle is jealous of Bubba the wombat...

He sits on top of the etagere making little huffing noises whenever Bubba cruises the living room.... I may have to write him into a fic.

Part 089 - BFB - Statement (c)

It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be, but it was worse than I had hoped. I know; that doesn’t make a lot of sense, but by the time we were done, I wasn’t making a lot of sense.

I had to go back over my whole relationship with Julie; everything I could remember had to be recorded. Every bit of conversation between Julie and me. They would transcribe the tapes when we were finished and then I would have to come back and read it over – again – and finally sign it.

It was just embarrassing; they wanted to hear everything, no matter how small or unnecessary. Julie and I had talked about a lot of things in the few months we’d known each other and it... hurt... to remember all that. It bothered me more than you can imagine to have to relate that we’d spent quite a lot of time boy-watching. I was sure that Heero would be upset, but his hands just rested on my shoulders, rubbing gently, and once he leaned down to murmur, “Bet you never saw anyone half as hot as you are.” That helped.

Once we reached the relevant time period, I had to stop a couple of times to get myself settled; I began having trouble making complete sentences. I started to cry a couple of times – I am so sick and tired of that – but the detective was really nice about it. She didn’t fuss over me, but neither did she act like I was a lump of pond scum.

When I was finished, I asked what Julie had said about the whole thing; if she’d told them why.

The detective sighed and apologized and said she couldn’t divulge that information. I started to puddle up again and decided to take my damp and drippy self out to the waiting area. Heero and Q also had to give their formal statements. I felt a little better sitting where I didn’t have to hear it all over again.

Of course, sitting in the hallway alone also meant I had lots of time to think. And think I did, in circles. I went around and around in my head and just kept coming back to ‘why?’ Why the hell did she set me up? Why the hell did she deliver me to that prick?

About the time I started wanting to pound my fists against the wall in frustration, a shimmer in the air announced the imminent arrival of a porter. A second later, Jake popped in. I wiped hastily at my eyes, which were once again leaking, and he sat down beside me.

“You okay?” he asked hesitantly.

“Just a little rattled, I guess,” I admitted. Loathe as I am to whine, I’ve found it’s easier to admit it when I’m unsettled or upset, because everyone can see the truth anyway, and if I try to avoid it, they just keep pecking away at me. If I go ahead and admit that I’m not 100%, they usually give me a hug and move on. It’s quicker that way. Less embarrassing in the end.

“But it’s over now, right?”

I sighed. “Yeah, I guess so.”

He laid his arm around my shoulders. “What’s wrong? They didn’t give you a hard time, did they?”

I snorted. “No. Q and Heero would have made sushi out of them if they had. It’s just...” Crap; I was puddling up again. I tried to hide behind my hand, but Jake isn’t stupid.

He gave me a little shake and a squeeze. “Just what, Duo? Should I get Heero?”

Heero was still wound way too tight right now.

“No,” I whispered. “I just don’t get it. Why she did it... We were friends, I thought.”

“We’ve all... well, wondered how you got involved with her...” he said slowly. “Why she would even hang around with a Magical Creature if she disliked them so...”

“She didn’t know,” I said, forgetting for that moment the cover story that Q had handed out. “I never told her.”

“But how...?”

I trust Jake, you understand. He’s a Magical Human, a Wizard of great talent and dedication. He’s a good guy, too. I consider him a friend. Maybe that’s why I didn’t attempt to still my tongue.

“She fed me drugs and took me to a man who raped me,” I whispered. “That’s why I’m still so twitchy. That’s why I was sick for so long. That’s why Heero and I still can’t...” I couldn’t finish. I couldn’t look at him, either.

An instant later, arms wrapped around my shoulders hugging me close.

“Duo, Duo; my god!” he whispered. “Why?!” he hissed.

I leaned into him, not caring anymore if the whole world sneered at me. “I don’t know... That’s what’s killing me; I don’t know why. We hung out together. I taught her to knit; she taught me... to crochet. We talked... I thought we were friends... And then she handed me over to a pervert... And I’ll never know why,” I almost sobbed. I let my head fall into my hands. I just wanted to go home and hide in the dark. Jake rubbed soothing circles on my back and petted my hair, murmuring soft nonsense. In a far corner of my mind, I thought about warning him that Heero would have a fit if he caught him touching my hair, but I didn’t. It was just so comforting. “I can’t even ask her...”

“Why not?” he murmured. “Who says you can’t ask her?”

“Well... I don’t know where she is... And I’m sure the cops aren’t going to let me see her,” I sighed wearily. “They have rules about that.”

“Screw them,” he growled all at once. I sat up, startled. “You need to talk to her,” he declared, “Regardless of their rules.” He grabbed hold of my hand and the hallway around us vanished.

...tbc...