lavandarlizard2: (Default)
[personal profile] lavandarlizard2
I've been shopping so my brain isn't right yet. This would be more. Um... I hope you like this as much as the last...




BFB - Part 081b - Herbalism 101



Duo let out a startled whoop as parchments and paper went flying. An instant later, he was on the floor, with Trowa on top of him doing his best to ravage his mouth.

The commotion brought Inazuma right over his desk.

“Trowa! Crap! Get off him!” He grabbed hold of Trowa’s shirt and one arm and hauled, getting exactly nowhere against the stronger creature. “Trowa!”

Duo flailed and struggled, trying to push Trowa off him, reclaim his mouth and gain some leverage all at the same time.

And then the Voice of Doom shook the walls.

“GET OFF MY BANSHEE!!”

And Trowa was flying through the air, pausing only long enough for Heero’s fist to connect with his face.

Inazuma cowered.

Wufei snarled like an angry animal.

Duo was on his feet in an instant, red-faced and furious.

“Whatthefuck?!” he yelled. “What the *hell* is going on here?!” He glared around the room; at Heero and Wufei, who had just walked in; at Inazuma, who had flattened himself against the wall to hopefully escape the Wyvern’s notice; at Trowa who now sprawled on the floor.

“Trowa! What the *fuck* were you doing?!”

The Were-Puma rolled onto his back, seemingly oblivious to both the punch and the fury bubbling in the room. “You smell s-o-o-o good...” he purred throatily.

Duo stared, open-mouthed. “What?!”

Heero bared his teeth and started toward the purring Were-Puma.

Wufei shut his mouth with a snap and began his own advance. “Dammit; you cheater!” Something tickled at his nose; he shook it off.

Heero grabbed Trowa by the front of his shirt, hauling him up to glare into his glazed green eyes. “I want an explanation and I want it *now*!” he demanded.

Trowa giggled and rubbed his head against Heero’s arm. “He smells *great*... Like... like... buttered popcorn... and... and... filet mignon... and... summertime...”

Heero blinked. “What...?”

Wufei rubbed at his nose. What the hell now?! He sneezed. Again. And again. He stifled another sneeze, and looked around the room. “Whatthefuck?” he grumbled.

Duo blinked and began pulling his clothing to order. “He’s been telling me how great I smell all afternoon...” He looked to Inazuma for confirmation.

The Elf nodded anxiously. “Yeah. He kept saying Duo smelled good. He even asked if he was wearing new cologne.”

Heero turned a midnight glare Duo’s way. The Banshee held up his hands. “Uh-uh; no cologne here. And it’s *not* my pheromones; not this time.”

Heero turned his attention back to the Were-Puma who was now attempting to snuggle with *him*. “What the hell is wrong with you?” he growled again.

Wufei sneezed again; violently. The reaction caused him to stagger, catching himself on the edge of Duo’s desk.

“What is in this room?” he gasped. “There’s something in here!”

Duo and Inazuma looked at each other.

The Elf shrugged in ignorance.

Duo shook his head. “I just brought some new plants for Dron...” he began.

Wufei whipped around so quickly to glare at the philodendron that he almost toppled over.

“*Shit*!” he yelled at the sight of the new plants. “That’s *catnip*!” He sneezed again, for emphasis.

Heero, Duo and Inazuma stared at him. Trowa began to wind himself sinuously around Heero, purring loudly.

“You smell great, Heero,” he mumbled.

Heero let go of him as if scalded; Trowa folded neatly to the floor and attempted to curl around Heero’s feet. The Wyvern stepped away.

“Catnip?” he growled. “What the hell does catnip have to do with anything?”

Wufei pulled his shirt up to cover his face and plucked the offending plant from the table, thrusting it at Inazuma. “Take it back to the gardens! Now!” He sneezed again. The River Elf scurried out with the small pot held gingerly in front of him, as if he expected it to explode.

“Catnip is an aphrodisiac, among other things, to cats!” Wufei yelled, flinging open the windows. “And I’m allergic to the fucking stuff!”

“Oh shit...” breathed Duo. “Ohmigod, Fei! I’m sorry! I didn’t know that! I didn’t even know it was catnip! It looks like mint! Oh, shit... Trowa...”

“Does he need medical attention?” asked Heero, eyeing the Were-Puma with wary concern. This was the first he’d heard of either of those things.

Wufei hung halfway out the window, breathing deeply. “No, he’ll just go to sleep and have a mother of a hangover when he wakes up. But you see why catnip is not a good office plant?”

“Yes, I see,” Heero muttered. He had to move; Trowa was once again slithering in his direction. “This is absurd.”

Duo knelt beside Trowa, pulling him up to rest half in his lap. The Were-Puma purred like a diesel engine and nuzzled at Duo’s hand. Gingerly, the Banshee began to pet him. Oh, he was going to have a hell of a bruise where Heero punched him, but he didn’t even seem to have noticed it yet. He settled right down, snuggling into the Banshee's lap, eyes closing with a big smile.

“What’s absurd about it?” Wufei snapped. “He’s a cat; he reacts to catnip. There’s nothing absurd about it. Just because *you* didn’t know...” He stuck his head back out the window for a few breaths.

“That doesn’t explain *you*. Since when are you allergic to catnip?”

“Since the first time I fell into a garden plot of the stuff at Hogwarts!” He glared at Heero, and then sneezed again. “It’s not exactly something I want everyone to know, okay?”

Heero’s lips twitched. “No, I don’t suppose you would...”

“Heero...” growled Wufei warningly. “Don’t even think it!” He glared at Trowa where he snuggled in the Banshee's lap, purring loudly. “And look at him! Right where he wanted to be! Cuddled up to Duo, dammit!”

Duo shrugged helplessly. “Well, it *is* my fault...”

Wufei stalked from the window to where Duo sat on the floor with Trowa. “Rotten cat,” he muttered. “I’ll take him home. I need to get my potion anyway.” He scooped Trowa up in his arms. The Were-Puma stretched and curled toward Wufei. The Were-Dragon rolled his eyes and sneezed again. “Crap.”

“Sorry, Wufei,” apologized Duo. “I had no idea...”

“Not your fault. Someone wanna call a porter?”

“Certainly,” murmured Heero, hiding his smirk.



...tbc...

Date: 2004-11-05 06:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sunhawk16.livejournal.com
Voice of Doom *snicker giggle*
GET OFF MY BANSHEE!! *chortles*
Trowa began to wind himself sinuously around Heero *howls*

*wipes eyes*
Ok... that was worth the little wait. ^__~ Now where's the rest?

Date: 2004-11-05 07:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lavendarlizard.livejournal.com
The next? Maybe tomorrow, if I can still sit at the computer by the time I get back from the zoo... and the train museum... and the 70-mile drive...

Oh crap... and I promised the Dragonette meatloaf this weekend.

Date: 2004-11-06 04:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sunhawk16.livejournal.com
Meatloaf? Count yourself lucky... I just got roped into having a bunch of kids over for an X-box game marathon. O.o
How in the hell did THAT happen?

Date: 2004-11-06 01:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lavendarlizard.livejournal.com
Dang; the fear-mongers are right! Video games *are* the work of the devil!

Did you maybe leave the room at the wrong moment and get volunteered?

At least meatloaf is quiet and respectful and doesn't interfere with my fun. And I get to eat it.

Date: 2004-11-07 05:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sunhawk16.livejournal.com
The kid has me over a barrel and knows it. *sigh* She's having a really rough episode with the group of friends that she's hung with for years and it looks like she's going to get ousted in the fall-out. ~_~ So she's desperately trying to hook up with some new friends... she knows I won't say 'No' to anything that might make headway.
Though... as it turned out, one of the kids was grounded and the whole thing fell through anyway. I should have made meatloaf... ^^;

Date: 2004-11-05 07:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bloodywingz.livejournal.com
*delirious grin* More!... MORE!!!! *clutches at you*

Date: 2004-11-05 07:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lavendarlizard.livejournal.com
*ack!* Down girl! *DOWN!*

Date: 2004-11-05 07:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bloodywingz.livejournal.com
Forgive me. I was slightly overwhelmed by all the testosterone in the air. Testosterone = personal catnip. Purrr!

Date: 2004-11-05 08:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lavendarlizard.livejournal.com
Oh, sure... Can I have my leg back?

Date: 2004-11-05 08:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bloodywingz.livejournal.com
*pouts followed by embarrassed laugh* *slowly releases leg and pats it to show that there was no harm done to it* Ahem. Sorry about that.

Date: 2004-11-05 08:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dee-ez-bee.livejournal.com
Auck! See?! *points finger at story* I was right, you were just yanking my chain!! "What catnip?" indeed!!! You you you... OH!

I loved it just the same!!!!

GET OFF MY BANSHEE! Could I see that one coming too!!

Just to cute! *runs off to fetch catnip toy and kitty*

Date: 2004-11-06 02:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lavendarlizard.livejournal.com
Well... I never *mentioned* catnip in the first part... *pouts*

Does this mean I am contributing to the delinquency of a feline? My own little furball has gathered her catnip toys around her and is trying (I think) to hatch them...

Date: 2004-11-05 08:52 pm (UTC)
merula31: by Sami (1x2)
From: [personal profile] merula31
Ah ha! Duo did become a cat toy! And so did Heero... and apparently Wufei might too. *snicker*

Date: 2004-11-06 02:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lavendarlizard.livejournal.com
...it's hard to say how far the circle might widen... ^__^ Good thing Wufei is taking him home.

AHA!!!

Date: 2004-11-06 12:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lordryous.livejournal.com
See!! I knew what i was talking about. What catnip indeed. : whaps the lizard : I wanna see kitsune-nip. hehe

Oh yea. you still need to through in a little 3x4 you evil dragon. I can only take so much of trowa fawning over duo. dont make me sick the cute kittens of death after you!

Re: AHA!!!

Date: 2004-11-06 02:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lavendarlizard.livejournal.com
*bares teeth and growls* Watch those whaps, dear; Dragons bite.

*checking files* 3x4... 3x4... hmm... don't see anything yet... maybe in the future...

Date: 2004-11-06 03:46 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Bwa ha ha ha!! *big panting gasping breath* Ha ha ha ha!!! Oh that's just WAY too cute!
I would like to borrow a cup of were-puma please! And maybe a banshee or wyvern if you happen to have any spares laying around!

Date: 2004-11-06 05:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lavendarlizard.livejournal.com
We actually have an unadvertised special on Were-Dragon right now - half price. Works great at ridding your doorstep of religious canvassers and won't eat the mail carrier.

Date: 2004-11-06 05:09 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Is he guaranteed to be house-trained and trained not to shamelessly throw himself at any banshees that might be hanging around, and only shamelessly throw his cute self at me?

Date: 2004-11-06 06:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lavendarlizard.livejournal.com
Hmm... Well, he's litter-box trained, but the Banshee thing is kind of up in the air. A few swats with a rolled up newspaper would probably do the trick. Or threaten him with Ling Ping Mei.

Date: 2004-11-07 12:15 am (UTC)
ext_42681: (coffeeblue)
From: [identity profile] kracken.livejournal.com
That was very funny! ^_^

Profile

lavandarlizard2: (Default)
lavandarlizard2

March 2019

S M T W T F S
     12
3456789
10111213141516
17 181920212223
24252627282930
31      

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jan. 26th, 2026 10:36 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios