xmas, sorta
Dec. 23rd, 2012 05:49 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lavandarlizard2So, I was bitten by a rabid hamster. This is the result. I don't generally 'do' xmas fics, because they usually end up with 'bah! humbug!' This time... Well... Just remember, that hamster was rabid. O_o
Ho-Ho-Ho
The break-room had been decorated to a fault; tinsel and glitter and swags and odd ornaments here and there. It had begun with the lack of funds in the budget for holiday decorating, so the agents and clerical and support staff had brought in their own bits of holiday cheer. It had grown to the point of spilling out of the room and down the hallway, well on the way to ambushing the elevators.
Tables had been pushed together to make a long buffet filled with real food, side dishes and to-die-for treats. Preventors had been nipping in for a bite here and there all morning. Even the delivery people had been invited to drop in for a cup of gourmet coffee or homemade cookies. Visiting agents from other offices were uniformly green with envy, muttering to each other about how their offices never did anything this cool.
Duo and Heero were just finishing up their lunch and Duo had snagged a take-out clamshell to take some extra fudge and cookies back to their office. Heero dumped their trash and followed Duo out. Wufei had just approached the dessert portion of the buffet and they all waved to each other.
“He's headed straight for the chocolate,” Heero chuckled.
“Always,” Duo replied with a grin. “Who knew the guy could have such a sweet tooth?”
They snickered over the thought of Chang Wufei on a sugar high. It never showed in his behavior, but his eyes would be vibrating all afternoon and Sally would have to drive him home.
Only a few steps from the elevator, Duo exclaimed in irritation and smacked his forehead. Heero gave him a quizzical look, but accepted the clamshell as Duo spun on his heel and quick stepped back to the party.
“Duo?”
“I forgot to warn Wufei about the ---”
A strangled howl cut him off and both men ran for the break-room.
They found Wufei doubled over next to the table, moaning and holding his face. There was a tiny smear of blood on one hand.
“Call a medic!” Duo yelled and half a dozen cellphones lit up. “Ohmigod, Wufei! I'm so sorry! I meant to warn you! I forgot! C'mon man, let me see.” He pried at Wufei's hand, still apologizing. “I know you love those things, man. I meant to tell you earlier, but the Kotsudo thing distracted me. Wufei, let me see! You're bleeding, dammit!”
Heero joined them, grabbing Wufei's arm and forcing it away from his face. “Open your damn mouth, Chang!” And he did. One does not argue with a pissed-off Yuy, not even a mortally wounded Chang.
“What is it?” Duo demanded and scanned the room for any sign of a medic.
Montaigne waved and signaled that they were in the elevator and would be there momentarily.
“Crap,” muttered Heero. “It could be a broken tooth. That seems to be where the blood is coming from... Sit down, Wufei. This is more than a band-aid can fix.”
Two medics came charging into the break-room, zeroing in on the cluster of agents in front of the buffet, and clearing a path by forward motion alone.
“A broken tooth?!” exclaimed Duo. “Aw, man; dammit, 'Fei, I should have caught you...”
Between removing Heero's fingers from his mouth and having the medic's fingers rudely inserted, Wufei managed to croak out, “What the hell, Maxwell?!”
Duo wrung his hands anxiously. “The chocolate-covered candy canes,” he breathed. “*She* sent them.”
“*Wha?!* I fout se wa banned!” he raged around the fingers.
“She promised Une no more cookies. I guess she made chocolate-covered candy canes instead,” Duo said miserably. “I am so sorry, man.”
The medics hoisted Wufei to his feet and hustled him out of the room. Everyone watched them go and then turned as one to stare at the plate of delicious-looking chocolate-dipped candy-canes. One of the clerks picked up the plate and dumped the things into the nearest trash bin.
Heero sighed. “It's a broken tooth. He's gonna need a root canal.”
Duo sighed. “Rock, paper, gundam, scissors for who gets to call Sally.”
“Go.”
Ho-Ho-Ho
The break-room had been decorated to a fault; tinsel and glitter and swags and odd ornaments here and there. It had begun with the lack of funds in the budget for holiday decorating, so the agents and clerical and support staff had brought in their own bits of holiday cheer. It had grown to the point of spilling out of the room and down the hallway, well on the way to ambushing the elevators.
Tables had been pushed together to make a long buffet filled with real food, side dishes and to-die-for treats. Preventors had been nipping in for a bite here and there all morning. Even the delivery people had been invited to drop in for a cup of gourmet coffee or homemade cookies. Visiting agents from other offices were uniformly green with envy, muttering to each other about how their offices never did anything this cool.
Duo and Heero were just finishing up their lunch and Duo had snagged a take-out clamshell to take some extra fudge and cookies back to their office. Heero dumped their trash and followed Duo out. Wufei had just approached the dessert portion of the buffet and they all waved to each other.
“He's headed straight for the chocolate,” Heero chuckled.
“Always,” Duo replied with a grin. “Who knew the guy could have such a sweet tooth?”
They snickered over the thought of Chang Wufei on a sugar high. It never showed in his behavior, but his eyes would be vibrating all afternoon and Sally would have to drive him home.
Only a few steps from the elevator, Duo exclaimed in irritation and smacked his forehead. Heero gave him a quizzical look, but accepted the clamshell as Duo spun on his heel and quick stepped back to the party.
“Duo?”
“I forgot to warn Wufei about the ---”
A strangled howl cut him off and both men ran for the break-room.
They found Wufei doubled over next to the table, moaning and holding his face. There was a tiny smear of blood on one hand.
“Call a medic!” Duo yelled and half a dozen cellphones lit up. “Ohmigod, Wufei! I'm so sorry! I meant to warn you! I forgot! C'mon man, let me see.” He pried at Wufei's hand, still apologizing. “I know you love those things, man. I meant to tell you earlier, but the Kotsudo thing distracted me. Wufei, let me see! You're bleeding, dammit!”
Heero joined them, grabbing Wufei's arm and forcing it away from his face. “Open your damn mouth, Chang!” And he did. One does not argue with a pissed-off Yuy, not even a mortally wounded Chang.
“What is it?” Duo demanded and scanned the room for any sign of a medic.
Montaigne waved and signaled that they were in the elevator and would be there momentarily.
“Crap,” muttered Heero. “It could be a broken tooth. That seems to be where the blood is coming from... Sit down, Wufei. This is more than a band-aid can fix.”
Two medics came charging into the break-room, zeroing in on the cluster of agents in front of the buffet, and clearing a path by forward motion alone.
“A broken tooth?!” exclaimed Duo. “Aw, man; dammit, 'Fei, I should have caught you...”
Between removing Heero's fingers from his mouth and having the medic's fingers rudely inserted, Wufei managed to croak out, “What the hell, Maxwell?!”
Duo wrung his hands anxiously. “The chocolate-covered candy canes,” he breathed. “*She* sent them.”
“*Wha?!* I fout se wa banned!” he raged around the fingers.
“She promised Une no more cookies. I guess she made chocolate-covered candy canes instead,” Duo said miserably. “I am so sorry, man.”
The medics hoisted Wufei to his feet and hustled him out of the room. Everyone watched them go and then turned as one to stare at the plate of delicious-looking chocolate-dipped candy-canes. One of the clerks picked up the plate and dumped the things into the nearest trash bin.
Heero sighed. “It's a broken tooth. He's gonna need a root canal.”
Duo sighed. “Rock, paper, gundam, scissors for who gets to call Sally.”
“Go.”
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no subject
Date: 2012-12-24 04:39 am (UTC)Merry Christmas.
no subject
Date: 2012-12-24 11:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-01-17 03:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-12-24 06:11 pm (UTC)Poor Chang! Root canals are not fun ways to spend the holidays...
*hugs you* This was hilarious!!
no subject
Date: 2012-12-24 11:40 pm (UTC)Wufei will have Sally to grumble to; until she sedates him in self defense. ^___^
no subject
Date: 2012-12-24 08:42 pm (UTC)Well the rabid hamsters sure had fun!
*pets Wufei* Poor dear, had to bite into the chocolate covered candy canes *snerks*
Rock, paper, gundam, scissors huh? How exactly does one make the hand sign for a gundam?
Ehehehe!
no subject
Date: 2012-12-24 11:46 pm (UTC)I always picture the 'gundam' gesture as a kind of claw that grabs anything and squishes it. ^___^ But that's just me.
no subject
Date: 2012-12-25 03:33 pm (UTC)XD I like that picture...works for me!